It’s been awhile I know… I find that I really want to keep up with my blog, but I have a very hard time doing this Being a mother and working full time (and more) makes it challenging to find the extra time. I’m a libra though so I should be able to find that balance.. it’s just taking me awhile.
A lot has happened since my last post, in August (wow!). Mainly, I started working full time again. I am still working as a nurse aid which is not what I ultimately want to do, but I’ve got time and I am still working on achieving my bigger goals. I turned 24 on the 4th of this month! I’m getting pretty old .. but it feels good (: ! And I have had a lot of different revelations that have caused me to have a new found peace. I am very happy about where I am in my spirit right now, but more to come on that later.
I wanted to take a moment to talk about our weaknesses. We all have them and wish that we did not. Whether your weakness is that you gossip too much, eat too much, envy others, whatever it is we have them, and NO ONE likes to feel weak hunny. However, do not be discouraged in your weaknesses - know that God is at work when you are confronted with a weakness. “And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groaning’s that cannot be expressed in words. (NLT) Romans 8:26.
When you realize a weakness, do not be discouraged just pray. Pray even if you do not know how or what exactly to pray for, the Holy Spirit will guide you. Lately, I have realized several weaknesses of my own. I’m only human, and I will never claim to be perfect, and y’all… I have a lot of weaknesses, but I am OK with that. I have been praying for God to work these weaknesses out, and oh have I seen him working!
For example, I am very stuck in my ways and when I have made up my mind about something, I don’t care what anyone has to say- I shut them out and shut down. Now, being a mother there are many cons in having this particular trait. Especially because they’re TWO people involved in parenting. So recently, my son’s father’s grandfather passed away. A lot of Jesaad’s (Isaiah’s dad) family have not gotten a chance to meet Isaiah yet. Long story short he asked me if Isaiah could go up to Missouri with him. Now my first reaction was “oh, heck NO!”. I could not imagine my son being away from me in another state for that long. Now, I work all weekend long and would not get to spend that much time with Isaiah, but at least I would know where he was at and I would get to see him as soon I got off work.
Now this was pretty selfish of me. I initially didn’t even stop to think about what Jesaad was saying to me or take time to pray and think about it. I didn't stop to consider Jesaad's feelings, and how inadequate I was making him feel as a father. A day after Jesaad made the request, I actually did take some time to pray about it. Well y’all I felt like I heard God say “let him go”. Well… I was like “are you sure God?” hahaha. Anyway, I had this tugging feeling that I needed to let Isaiah go with his father. So, even though I would have rather let him stay with me, I let him go, but not before I had a VERY long talk with Jesaad. Though I miss him terribly, I speak to him every chance I get, and he sounds so good, and so happy, and his father is happy to have him with him and all of that makes me HAPPY.
I share this story because one of my weaknesses is stubbornness, and if I had not prayed to God, Isaiah would not have gone on that trip. I was set on not letting him go. God told me to let him go and helped me with my stubbornness in that situation. Now, I’m still pretty stubborn but he is working on me.
When you’re confronted with one of your weaknesses, I challenge you all to take some time and pray about it. Don’t get frustrated, get excited! Know that God is trying to get your attention! You will be amazed in the ways you see God work on you. <3
Until next time!
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